Category Archives: Letting go

Two things


Had two things I really had to do today.

I did them both.

Before lunch.

Is it possible I’m starting to be a functioning human being again?

That said, the only thing I’ve eaten today is chocolate brownie…


Final Days


The countdown is on now. Three and a half days til they are gone.

I don’t know what is happening with Nan. After such a positive experience last week, this week no reply to my letter and she didn’t pick up the phone when I rang her. We will just have to wait and see. The kids are really positive about living with Nan and I think they genuinely want to go.

For now I”m soaking up all the snuggles I can get and trying to keep things sane and normal for my beautiful kidlets.

It’s stupid…


…but some of the things I struggle with the most are the food they are given to eat (junk junk and more junk), the fact they aren’t made to sleep enough and the suspicion that they can pretty much do what they want.

I know they are safe. I know they are loved. I know that mentally and emotionally they are likely better off with Nan. But dammit I want them to eat fruit and veggies, get enough sleep and have rules to follow!

I guess essentially they will be better off in areas I couldn’t really control and worse off in areas I could. And I’ve been holding on pretty tightly to those things I could control for the last seven months and now I need to learn how to let go.